FASHION SONG

I feel sorry for the goth in the summer time
And I feel sorry for the hippies in the cold
I fee sorry for the metrosexual all year round
Because the new shirt that he bought is old
And I feel sorry for the man with socks in his sandals
Perfectly matched and pulled up to his knees
And I feel sorry for the child who’s standing beside
Doing all he can not to be seen
And I feel sorry for that guy from that pop-punk band Good Charlotte
What a contradiction I can’t understand it
He sings songs about how his life has gone wrong and how he has no luck with girls
But I think if he stopped dressing like a dickhead, that might help

I’m sorry for this phase you’re going through
And I’m sorry that your foot’s on the wrong shoe
I’m sorry, but I’ve done it too
I used to wear Adidas parachute pants
Everyday to school

One day I wore tem round backwards by mistake
And I was laughed at by all my classmates
And I turned red in the face and turned them around
But when I walked they still made a swooshy sound
And now I always check the tag

I feel sorry for those poodles with those stupid haircuts
And I feel sorry for their owners, cos they must be fucking nuts

I’m sorry for this phase you’re going through
And I’m sorry that your foot’s on the wrong shoe
I’m sorry, but I’ve done it too
I used to wear Adidas parachute pants
Everyday to school

I feel sorry for parcking inspectors
But I still think you guys really suck
When all of our carparks have been turned into buildings
Where do you expect us to park?
And one hundred dollars for five minutes in a loading zone
Is really really fucked
But I’m not angry anymore
Cos when I see you in your uniform
I know that everybody hates you
And you wish that you were never born

I’m sorry for this phase you’re going through
And I’m sorry that your foot’s on the wrong shoe
I’m sorry, but I’ve done it too
I used to wear Adidas parachute pants
Everyday to school